Encanto as a Mirror for Ourselves
"The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are." — Carl Jung
At Fearless CounSouling, we believe stories help us understand ourselves.
Long before psychology existed as a profession, people made sense of their lives through myths, fairy tales, parables, dreams, symbols, and shared stories. They gave language to experiences that were difficult to explain and helped us make meaning of what it means to be human.
One of my favorite modern stories is Disney's Encanto.
While many people see it as a movie about magic, I see it as a story about family systems, trauma, adaptation, identity, and healing.
Every character reminds us of something within ourselves, their stories illuminate our own.
Every Family Has a Casita
In Encanto, the Casita is more than a magical house.
It holds generations of memories.
It protects.
It adapts.
It carries the family's history within its walls.
In many ways, it reminds me of the human psyche.
Every room holds a story.
Every hallway connects experiences.
Every crack appears for a reason.
When the house begins to crack, the problem isn't that the Casita has failed.
The cracks simply reveal where too much pressure has been carried for too long.
Many of us arrive in therapy because we've begun noticing the cracks in our own lives.
Not because we're broken.
Because we've been carrying more than anyone was meant to carry alone.
Every Character Represents an Adaptation
One of the reasons Encanto resonates with so many people is because each character found a different way of belonging within the family.
Each gift became more than a magical ability.
It became an identity.
A role.
A way of contributing.
A way of feeling valuable.
Many of us do the same thing.
Some become the responsible one.
Some become the caretaker.
Some become the achiever.
Some become the peacekeeper.
Some become the entertainer.
Some become the truth teller.
Some become the strong one.
Some become invisible.
These adaptations are remarkably intelligent.
They often develop in response to our relationships, our environments, and the experiences that shaped us.
They help us survive.
But over time, they can begin to feel less like choices and more like requirements.
Healing isn't about losing the gifts we've developed.
It's about discovering that we are more than the roles we've learned to play.
Here are a few examples from the movie:
Luisa: Strength and the Weight of Responsibility
Luisa's gift is strength.
Not simply physical strength, but the belief that she must remain strong because everyone depends on her.
She carries impossible burdens without complaint.
She protects.
She endures.
She believes that if she stops carrying the weight, everything she loves might come crashing down.
Her song, Surface Pressure, gives voice to an experience many people know well.
From the outside, she appears nearly invincible.
Inside, she's exhausted.
Healing doesn't ask Luisa to become less strong.
It invites her to discover that she is worthy of love even when she isn't carrying everyone else's burdens.
Her strength becomes a gift rather than an obligation.
Luisa Song: Surface Pressure
Isabela: Perfection and Authentic Expression
Isabela appears to have the perfect life.
She creates beauty effortlessly.
Everything she touches becomes flawless.
Yet perfection has become another prison.
Many people develop an unspoken belief that love is earned through getting everything right.
Mistakes become dangerous.
Messiness feels unacceptable.
When Isabela begins creating wild, imperfect beauty, she discovers something profound.
Authenticity creates more life than perfection ever could.
Healing isn't becoming less gifted.
It's becoming more free.
Isabela Song: What Else Can I do
Bruno: The Shadow
Bruno tells the truth no one wants to hear.
Rather than listening, the family distances itself from him.
Carl Jung described the shadow as the parts of ourselves and our families that we struggle to acknowledge.
Ignoring the shadow doesn't make it disappear.
It simply moves into the background where it quietly influences everything.
Often the person labeled "the problem" is carrying truths the entire system has not yet been able to face.
Healing begins when curiosity replaces blame.
Pepa: Emotions Are Weather
Pepa's emotions change the weather.
The family spends enormous energy trying to keep her calm.
Many of us learned similar lessons.
Don't cry.
Don't be angry.
Don't be too much.
Don't make other people uncomfortable.
But emotions are not the problem.
They are information.
Like weather, they move through us.
The goal isn't to eliminate storms.
It's to develop the capacity to experience them without believing they'll last forever.
Bruno and Pepa song: Song: We Don't Talk About Bruno
Camilo: Becoming Whoever Others Need
Camilo changes into whoever the moment requires.
Many people do this psychologically.
They become experts at reading rooms.
Matching energy.
Avoiding conflict.
Keeping everyone comfortable.
Over time they may begin asking,
"Who am I when I'm not becoming who everyone else needs?"
Healing creates space for authenticity to emerge.
Dolores: Hearing Everything
Dolores notices what others miss.
Sensitivity can be a beautiful gift.
It can also become overwhelming when we feel responsible for everything we notice.
Part of healing is learning that awareness doesn't require carrying it all.
Boundaries allow sensitivity to become wisdom instead of burden.
Abuela Alma: Love Shaped by Trauma
Abuela's story begins with unimaginable loss.
Everything she does afterward makes sense when viewed through that grief.
Her control isn't rooted in cruelty.
It's rooted in fear.
She believes protecting the miracle means protecting the family.
Many of us inherit protective patterns from generations before us.
Understanding them doesn't excuse harm.
It helps explain how love sometimes becomes tangled with fear.
Mirabel: The Gift of Curiosity
Mirabel believes she has no gift.
Yet she possesses the one quality that makes healing possible.
Curiosity.
She notices the cracks.
She asks difficult questions.
She remains connected when others pull away.
She doesn't begin by trying to fix the family.
She begins by trying to understand it.
That is the heart of CounSouling.
Healing rarely begins with answers.
It begins with curiosity.
Antonio: Belonging Before Performance
Antonio receives his gift surrounded by encouragement.
He is supported before he succeeds.
Seen before he performs.
Loved before he proves himself.
This is what secure attachment makes possible.
Children flourish when belonging isn't something they have to earn.
Song: Family Madrigal
The Miracle
By the end of the story, no one loses their gifts.
Luisa is still strong.
Isabela is still creative.
Pepa still feels deeply.
Bruno still sees what others miss.
What changes is their relationship to those gifts.
They are no longer required to perform in order to deserve love.
To me, this is one of the most beautiful metaphors for healing.
We don't lose the parts of ourselves that helped us survive.
We simply discover they are no longer the only ways we know how to live.
We become free to choose.
And perhaps that's the greatest miracle of all.
Not that the magic returned.
But that the family remembered they belonged to one another long before the miracle ever appeared.
Song: All of You
There is a lot more I could say about the metaphors of this incredible movie. I highly encourage you to watch it and watch it again, and to listen to the sound track to support you on your journey!
Long before psychology existed as a profession, people made sense of their lives through myths, fairy tales, parables, dreams, symbols, and shared stories. They gave language to experiences that were difficult to explain and helped us make meaning of what it means to be human.
One of my favorite modern stories is Disney's Encanto.
While many people see it as a movie about magic, I see it as a story about family systems, trauma, adaptation, identity, and healing.
Every character reminds us of something within ourselves, their stories illuminate our own.
Every Family Has a Casita
In Encanto, the Casita is more than a magical house.
It holds generations of memories.
It protects.
It adapts.
It carries the family's history within its walls.
In many ways, it reminds me of the human psyche.
Every room holds a story.
Every hallway connects experiences.
Every crack appears for a reason.
When the house begins to crack, the problem isn't that the Casita has failed.
The cracks simply reveal where too much pressure has been carried for too long.
Many of us arrive in therapy because we've begun noticing the cracks in our own lives.
Not because we're broken.
Because we've been carrying more than anyone was meant to carry alone.
Every Character Represents an Adaptation
One of the reasons Encanto resonates with so many people is because each character found a different way of belonging within the family.
Each gift became more than a magical ability.
It became an identity.
A role.
A way of contributing.
A way of feeling valuable.
Many of us do the same thing.
Some become the responsible one.
Some become the caretaker.
Some become the achiever.
Some become the peacekeeper.
Some become the entertainer.
Some become the truth teller.
Some become the strong one.
Some become invisible.
These adaptations are remarkably intelligent.
They often develop in response to our relationships, our environments, and the experiences that shaped us.
They help us survive.
But over time, they can begin to feel less like choices and more like requirements.
Healing isn't about losing the gifts we've developed.
It's about discovering that we are more than the roles we've learned to play.
Here are a few examples from the movie:
Luisa: Strength and the Weight of Responsibility
Luisa's gift is strength.
Not simply physical strength, but the belief that she must remain strong because everyone depends on her.
She carries impossible burdens without complaint.
She protects.
She endures.
She believes that if she stops carrying the weight, everything she loves might come crashing down.
Her song, Surface Pressure, gives voice to an experience many people know well.
From the outside, she appears nearly invincible.
Inside, she's exhausted.
Healing doesn't ask Luisa to become less strong.
It invites her to discover that she is worthy of love even when she isn't carrying everyone else's burdens.
Her strength becomes a gift rather than an obligation.
Luisa Song: Surface Pressure
Isabela: Perfection and Authentic Expression
Isabela appears to have the perfect life.
She creates beauty effortlessly.
Everything she touches becomes flawless.
Yet perfection has become another prison.
Many people develop an unspoken belief that love is earned through getting everything right.
Mistakes become dangerous.
Messiness feels unacceptable.
When Isabela begins creating wild, imperfect beauty, she discovers something profound.
Authenticity creates more life than perfection ever could.
Healing isn't becoming less gifted.
It's becoming more free.
Isabela Song: What Else Can I do
Bruno: The Shadow
Bruno tells the truth no one wants to hear.
Rather than listening, the family distances itself from him.
Carl Jung described the shadow as the parts of ourselves and our families that we struggle to acknowledge.
Ignoring the shadow doesn't make it disappear.
It simply moves into the background where it quietly influences everything.
Often the person labeled "the problem" is carrying truths the entire system has not yet been able to face.
Healing begins when curiosity replaces blame.
Pepa: Emotions Are Weather
Pepa's emotions change the weather.
The family spends enormous energy trying to keep her calm.
Many of us learned similar lessons.
Don't cry.
Don't be angry.
Don't be too much.
Don't make other people uncomfortable.
But emotions are not the problem.
They are information.
Like weather, they move through us.
The goal isn't to eliminate storms.
It's to develop the capacity to experience them without believing they'll last forever.
Bruno and Pepa song: Song: We Don't Talk About Bruno
Camilo: Becoming Whoever Others Need
Camilo changes into whoever the moment requires.
Many people do this psychologically.
They become experts at reading rooms.
Matching energy.
Avoiding conflict.
Keeping everyone comfortable.
Over time they may begin asking,
"Who am I when I'm not becoming who everyone else needs?"
Healing creates space for authenticity to emerge.
Dolores: Hearing Everything
Dolores notices what others miss.
Sensitivity can be a beautiful gift.
It can also become overwhelming when we feel responsible for everything we notice.
Part of healing is learning that awareness doesn't require carrying it all.
Boundaries allow sensitivity to become wisdom instead of burden.
Abuela Alma: Love Shaped by Trauma
Abuela's story begins with unimaginable loss.
Everything she does afterward makes sense when viewed through that grief.
Her control isn't rooted in cruelty.
It's rooted in fear.
She believes protecting the miracle means protecting the family.
Many of us inherit protective patterns from generations before us.
Understanding them doesn't excuse harm.
It helps explain how love sometimes becomes tangled with fear.
Mirabel: The Gift of Curiosity
Mirabel believes she has no gift.
Yet she possesses the one quality that makes healing possible.
Curiosity.
She notices the cracks.
She asks difficult questions.
She remains connected when others pull away.
She doesn't begin by trying to fix the family.
She begins by trying to understand it.
That is the heart of CounSouling.
Healing rarely begins with answers.
It begins with curiosity.
Antonio: Belonging Before Performance
Antonio receives his gift surrounded by encouragement.
He is supported before he succeeds.
Seen before he performs.
Loved before he proves himself.
This is what secure attachment makes possible.
Children flourish when belonging isn't something they have to earn.
Song: Family Madrigal
The Miracle
By the end of the story, no one loses their gifts.
Luisa is still strong.
Isabela is still creative.
Pepa still feels deeply.
Bruno still sees what others miss.
What changes is their relationship to those gifts.
They are no longer required to perform in order to deserve love.
To me, this is one of the most beautiful metaphors for healing.
We don't lose the parts of ourselves that helped us survive.
We simply discover they are no longer the only ways we know how to live.
We become free to choose.
And perhaps that's the greatest miracle of all.
Not that the magic returned.
But that the family remembered they belonged to one another long before the miracle ever appeared.
Song: All of You
There is a lot more I could say about the metaphors of this incredible movie. I highly encourage you to watch it and watch it again, and to listen to the sound track to support you on your journey!
"The miracle is not some magic that you've got. The miracle is you, not some gift, just you. The miracle is you!" - Abuela from the song "All of You"